The Gender Genie is mostly working. After spending what felt like an eternity looking at code followed by banging my head on the desk, it turns out the whole thing was brought down by only five lines of bad parsing. Some of the Genie's functionality is still wonky, mainly the form that handles its statistics, so I've taken those bits offline until I have the strength to look at it again.

If anyone manages to break it, please let me know. This way, I won't delay in finding a bridge and throwing myself over the side. [Oh, I'm kidding. The nearest bridge that's high enough has to be at least a mile away. It'd be much easier to just walk a few blocks to the main road and simply step in front of a bus.]